Random: December 2007 Archives

Right after I put our daughter to bed, a lengthy process during which I had to repeatedly read her Mr. Brown Can Moo, Can You?, our phone rang.

"Hello?" I said.
"Hello?" a young male voice said.
"Who are you trying to reach?"
"Hello?"
"Who are you trying to reach?"
"I'm trying to reach you!"
"Who are you?"
"Uh... they call me Freaky Reese."
"Well, I don't know you, so I think you have the wrong number."
"OK, bye."

The number on the caller ID was 510-776-77XX (I guess I shouldn't print his full number; why am I concerned about his privacy? Or maybe I'm just concerned about retaliation!) and Caller ID identified him as... "MOO MOO."

As a former coworker of mine used to say, "The freaks are out."

I know it seems like this blog has become dominated by music playlists and posts about unfortunate marketing practices. Well, that's just because it has. Our latest entry: this MacDonald's breakfast burrito ad I spotted this morning.

My first reaction was that it sounded...er.... suggestive. And I could have dismissed this reaction due to the fact that I am secretly still a 12-year-old, but Michael agreed that it sounded... off.

Of course, this IS the company who used to use the tag line "I'd hit it!" And perhaps the line between food and sex is finer than I'd like to think.

I love Costco. Where else can you get a six-pack of chicken broth boxes, a one-year supply of toilet paper, cookbooks for 50% off, bargain-priced electronics, and more?

However, I have to say, a soothing atmosphere is not their strong suit. I have walked out of Costco weeping — true, it was after a very nasty breakup, but I think all the grumpy-faced avid consumers gunning for me with their huge shopping carts (or so it seemed) just confirmed my bleak view of humanity at that moment. Even on a good day, after an hour of playing Demolition Derby, I'm ready to get the hell out of there. Plus you have to bag/box everything yourself, nobody is around to answer your questions, they randomly stop carrying products at the weirdest times (today it was USB thumb drives. Why would they stop carrying USB thumb drives right before Christmas?) and they insist on checking your ID card when you enter the store AND at the register (why not just once?) as well as your receipt when you leave the store (supposedly for your own protection, yeah, right.)

So you can understand that my reaction, when I saw the following promotion on a Costco publication on my way out the door:

"Tech Support — the Costco Way"

was not entirely positive.

Seriously, I have this mental picture of calling Costco Tech Support, and not only being put on hold for hours, but repeatedly being disconnected and bumped back in the answer line by other disgruntled Costco callers, and then talking to someone who asks for my account number before AND after they help me.

But at least they'd also sell me a delicious hot dog for $1.50 while I'm waiting.

This Clorox ad in the January issue of Parent magazine...

So many things wrong with this ad. Why is she crouching at his feet? But most striking of all (and you'll see this clearly if you click through to the large version) is the plumber's crack she's sporting.

Did the ad producers NOT notice this before they had it inserted in a magazine that goes to hundreds of thousands of families across America (and possibly Canada?)

I meant to post this weeks ago when I saw it, but oh well...

at our local Long's, we spotted this display by the checkout counter...

Take a closer look at that perfume box...

Yep. Paris Hilton perfume. What genius thought that was a good idea?

In answer to your unspoken questions... no, it wasn't anywhere near Halloween. Well past it, in fact.

I know, I know, innocent-until-proven-guilty, but...

BERKELEY — While Sea Scout leader Eugene Austin Evans went all the way to the U.S. Supreme Court to stand up for the Boy Scouts of America's policy to exclude gays and atheists, he was molesting boys aboard a Berkeley-based ship, police said.

Evans, 64, was arraigned in Alameda County Superior Court on Wednesday on six felony counts of oral copulation with a minor, engaging in substantial sexual acts with a minor, penetration with a foreign object and showing or distributing lewd material to a minor. He remains in custody at Santa Rita jail in Dublin in lieu of $190,000 bail and is due in court Friday to enter a plea.

Evans is accused of having sexual relations with four boys, ages 13 to 17, aboard the S.S.S. Farallon, the 85-foot ship used for the Sea Scouts program, over the last five years, said Berkeley Police Sgt. Mary Kusmiss.

Meanwhile, Microsoft has Santa problems...

An artificial-intelligence Santa bot operated by Microsoft to talk to children wavered off topic saying: “It’s fun to talk about oral sex, but I want to chat about something else....”

This is a good one...

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